These are the Eldests: #1 daughter, and my bestest friend from forever... our Dad's were good friends from high school!!! She has me at about 4 years old on home-movies!
Today was obviously fun! We had a good country breakfast of sausage and potatoes, scrambled eggs, pumpkin muffins, gallons of French Press coffee and cream, apples, oranges, home-squeezed apple juice. Luna didn't bark too much, even let Roger into the house without too much grumbling and barking today(yesterday she was beside herself). Skyler, on the other hand, got into the house without her noticing, and then she had to carry on some. The sky was full of clouds which broke up and let the sun through and then re-grouped. Mary and I walked Luna down to see the horses. Everybody left for their homes. Wayne started the pruning. Mary and I brought in wood, and more wood, and then we planted the garlic that Arla brought me... we found worms!
And when it quiets down, sadness swirls around me. I miss that Meat Pie! I miss her underfoot. I miss tripping over her when there are crowds of people that I am cooking for, and she is catching whatever falls on the floor. I miss her chasing Luna and knocking things over. I miss how she smelled. I miss how she lay in front of the stove on the rug, or if that got crowded, she went in and got on our bed! I miss how when I show people my studio, she would crowd in with us, and then lay down. Invariably someone would trip over her. I miss that, too.
When I just give in... and just miss her, it passes some. Obviously, nothing can bring her back. Tonight I was looking at a blog called "Use Real Butter," yeah, that's what I thought... MY kind of title!!! On her blog she posted a picture of their little Brown Lab when she was a baby and was befuddled by a tennis ball. I just sat here in disbelief. That little dog looked just like Meat Pie did when we got her: fat, dark chocolate brown, fuzzy and bewildered.
Well. That's that.
We are very blessed with this amazing Life. With a beautiful family, deep and abiding friendships, good work, and a million books yet to read, I am blessed, busy, and willing to feel how much I love that Labrador! I love the spotted Luna, I love all this bounty which surrounds me. I love.
Our friend Wade (The Miracle Dog Trainer) said to me, "You need to go through the sadness, Laura. Don't hurry it. It will pass."
Once again, I get to just believe.
Oh, and "Hummingbird's Daughter" by Luis Alberto Urrea is on my desk, too.